pompey_01

Title: Crash
Author: Pompey 
Universe: Elementary
Rating: PG
Warnings: adult word
Word count: 350
Summary: Joan stops the Car Killer the only way she can.
Prompt: July 26 – Winner takes all. Gambling/risky endeavors

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“Desmond!” Joan shouted at the Car Killer. He swung his attention from Holmes to her. “You want to hit someone? Well, here I am, you cowardly piece of shit!” She held her arms out in invitation, flaring out the front of her ankle-length trench coat.

“Joan, no!” Sherlock shouted back but as Joan stared down Desmond Stevenson through his windshield, they all knew who his next target had just become. Holmes ran towards the car, despite knowing there was a slim to none chance he would be in time to stop a tragedy

Desmond revved his engine once, twice. The only motion from Joan was the fluttering of her trench coat as she bent both arms at the elbows to flash him a double bird. Immediately there was a squeal of tires on asphalt as he gunned the engine and barreled towards her.

“Joan!” Sherlock called, still running after the car.

Joan bent her knees almost imperceptibly and hunched her shoulders slightly. With barely enough time to spare, she flung herself to the left. Her tuck and roll was more of a flail and tumble but it did the job. Desmond hit the brakes but couldn’t stop himself from crashing into the hydrant that Joan’s long trench coat had hidden from view.

A geyser of water erupted, drenching everything in a twenty foot radius, including Joan and a panting Sherlock who had finally reached her. In front of them, the police moved in to bring in their man.

They stared at each other through the falling water. Joan spoke first. “You’re going to say that was stupid risk, that I was gambling with my life. But it wasn’t. I made sure to keep the hydrant hidden before I got his attention. I made sure to insult him so he’d focus only on me and not try any surprises. I timed it perfectly. And I made sure nobody else got hurt besides Desmond. I had everything under control. You’ve got nothing to complain about.”

 Holmes looked at her in silence for a second. Then two.

“Your tuck and roll was sloppy.”

Title: Music to Arrest By
Author: Pompey
Universe: Elementary
Rating: G
Warnings: author is tired and being silly
Word count: 200
Summary: Joan’s sense of humor has terrible timing.
Prompt: July 8 – Sarasate Navarra Op. 33

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Of course their perp just would have to try to escape by cutting through an outdoor concert. Joan took the left, Sherlock the middle, and Gregson the right. As they closed in on their target, however, she showed surprising agility, ducking and weaving her way through the seated throngs in an effort to avoid the three detectives. Even more impressive was how she did so in almost perfect rhythm with the violins and piano currently playing on the stage.

Then Joan caught sight of Holmes and Gregson creeping behind the perp also almost in time with the staccato pluckings and the whole thing looked so much like an old school Warner Brothers cartoon that Joan started shaking with suppressed giggles.

Then, as the music intensified, the perp bolted in Joan’s direction. Unable to do much more, thanks to her giggles, Joan merely stuck out her foot and their thief promptly face-planted into the grass.  Then everyone began clapping. Joan sat on the perp and gave way to laughter. She knew perfectly well that they were only applauding the end of the song but the timing was so perfect that she couldn’t help but acknowledge the sheer absurdity of it all.

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A/N: I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, the music is lovely but the video I watched had violinists that looked like they were trying to duel and it just reminded me of orchestral music from WB cartoons SO MUCH.